Gaslighting is one of the most useful tools available in parenting. Wikipedia provides a succinct description of this method:
Gaslighting or gas-lighting is manipulation through persistent denial, misdirection, contradiction, and lying in an attempt to destabilize and delegitimize a target.
This method addresses a number of issues in parenting by weakening your child's grasp on reality, making it easier to pull the wool over their eyes. These are just some of the objectives that can be met using this technique:
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Sample Statements
The following are handy phrases that are tried and tested and can be used in a broad range of scenarios whenever you feel challenged by your child and want to turn their doubts against themselves rather than you.
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Denounce in Public, Deride in Private
Remember to couple any gaslighting you do in private with public exposure of your child's propensity to wildly exaggerate and misinterpret matters. This not only doubles the insecurity your child experiences as a result, it also serves to thoroughly discredit your child and reduce the likelihood of them finding any outside allies.
Advanced Gaslighting
When you have mastered this technique, you will not only be able to define reality just the way it currently suits you for your child, you will even be able to turn discussions to revolve around you, and how your child has made you a victim through their bizarre notions.
At the advanced stages of this craft, you can move beyond questioning your child's interpretation and framing it as faulty.
You can actually swing a tactical strike by turning their righteous questions into a personal attack against you, where all you ever wanted was the best for the child. This is the right moment for crocodile tears. If you can weep on command, now is the time to use this skill. |
Not only will your child now utterly lose confidence and question their senses, they will also go away with a resonating sense of guilt for hurting you so badly. Done correctly, advanced gaslighting will end up with the child apologising to your for having doubted you and for causing so much pain, vowing betterment. This will buy you a long time of peace and quiet.